An undergraduate boy was very attracted to a charming and delightful woman in one of his classes. She was bright, witty, good looking, and very friendly. She also was in a wheelchair because she’d lost both legs in an accident. This proved to be no real barrier, however; this was one formidable woman whether she … Read more
A little boy returning home from his first day at school said to his mother, “Mom, what’s sex?” His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had … Read more
Grandpa and Little Johnny are sitting on a bench in the park. Johnny asked, “Grandpa, are you going to take that new Viagra?” Grandpa, caught off-guard, looks at him and says, “No Johnny, I will not. “ “But Grandpa, why not?” asks little Johnny. Grandpa replies, “Well Johnny, because there is no sense in putting … Read more
Pauly’s family is at dinner, the 10-year-old daughter isn’t eating much, and she just keeps her head down. After a few minutes, she says, “I have something to tell you. “ Everyone gets silent and they all listen. “I am no longer the virgin I used to be. “And she begins to cry. A long … Read more
With the help of a fertility specialist, a 75 year old woman becomes pregnant and delivers a baby. All her relatives come to visit and meet the newest member of their family. When they ask to see the baby, the 75 year old mother says, “Not yet. “ A little later they ask to see … Read more
One misty Scottish morning a man is driving through the hills to Inverness. Suddenly out of the mist, a massive red-haired highlander steps into the middle of the road. The man is at least six feet four, has a huge red beard and, despite the wind, mist, and near freezing temperatures, is wearing only his … Read more
Someone mistakenly leaves the cages open in the reptile house at the Zoo and there are snakes slithering all over the place. Frantically, the keeper tries everything, but he can’t get them back in their cages. Finally he says, “Quick, call my mother in law!” “Your mother in law? Why??” “We need someone who speaks … Read more
A golfer is walking down the road carrying his clubs when he sees an Arab being held up at gunpoint. He pulls out a wedge and smashes it over the back of the robber’s head, knocking him unconscious. “You probably saved my life, “says the grateful Arab. “I am a member of the Saudi Royal … Read more
The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s. “May I help you?” she asked. “I want to see Valerie, “the man replied. “Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else, “said the madam. “No, I must see … Read more
Little Johnny’s first grade class was playing “Name That Animal. “The teacher held up a picture of a cat and asked, “What animal is this?” “A cat!” said Suzy. “Good job. Now, what’s this animal?” “A dog!” said Ricky. “Good. Now what animal is this?” she asked, holding up a picture of a deer. The … Read more