Two lawyers had been lifelong friends: they were partners and shared everything, including their hot-blooded secretary. One day the secretary announced she was pregnant. They told her not to worry and assured her that they would pay all medical costs and would act as co-fathers when the child was born and provide all expenses thereafter. … Read more
A doctor says to his patient, “I have bad news and worse news. “ “Oh dear, what’s the bad news?” asks the patient. The doctor replies, “You only have 24 hours to live. “ “That’s terrible, “said the patient. “How can the news possibly be worse?” The doctor replies, “I’ve been trying to contact you … Read more
Doctor: “What seems to be your problem?” Patient: “When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour. “ Doctor: “Try getting up one hour later. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, “Give me the fingers and I’ll see what I can do. “ “But I don’t have the fingers!” “Why didn’t you bring the fingers?!” asks the incredulous doctor. “Doc, I couldn’t pick them … Read more
Girl: “I can’t be your valentine for medical reasons. “ Boy: “Really?” Girl: “Yeah, you make me sick!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Patient goes to the Doctor, and the doctor starts looking at him… “Good, good, good…” “Doctor, what’s good?” “Good that I don’t have what you have… “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Doctor to the patient: “Did I not give you the medicine yesterday? Did you take it?” Patient: “Yes, sir. But I did not drink it. “ Doctor: “Why?” Patient “Because it is written on the label: ‘Close the cork tightly and keep it in a cool place. ‘“ This joke is included in the Black … Read more
An old man goes to his doctor. The doctor says “I got some bad news for you. you have an allergy and you have Alzheimer’s. “ And the old man says “At least I don’t have an allergy. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Between friends: “I saw the doctor today about my loss of memory. “ “What did he do?” “He made me pay him in advance. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Breaking news: A man was admitted to the hospital today with 23 plastic toy horses inserted in his rectum. Doctors have described his condition as stable. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.