The patient shook his doctor’s hand in gratitude and said, “Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will. “ “That is very kind of you, “said the doctor emotionally, and … Read more
Mitchell saw his doctor and asked if he had ever laughed at a patient. “In over 20 years I haven’t because I try to remain professional. “ With that Mitchell dropped his trousers revealing the tiniest dick the doctor had ever seen. It wasn’t any bigger than a AAA battery. The doctor burst into uncontrollable … Read more
NASA was interviewing professionals to be sent to Mars. Only one could go and couldn’t return to Earth. The first applicant, an engineer, was asked how much he wanted to be paid for going. “A million dollars, “he answered, “because I want to donate it to my favorite Institute of Technology” The next applicant, a … Read more
A lawyer finds out he has a brain tumor, and it’s inoperable – in fact, it’s so large, they have to do a brain transplant. His doctor gives him a choice of available brains – there’s a jar of rocket scientist brains for $10 an ounce, a jar of regular scientist brains for $15 an … Read more
A guy finds his dog with the neighbor’s pet rabbit in its mouth. The rabbit is dead and the guy panics. He takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house. He gives it a bath, blows dry its fur, and puts it back into the cage at the neighbor’s house, hoping they will think … Read more
“Doctor, my sister thinks that she is a lift. “ “Tell her to come in. “ “I cannot” “Why so?” “Because she does not stop at this floor. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Joey went to a psychiatrist. “Doc, “he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there’s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there’s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. “you gotta help me, I’m going crazy!” “Just put yourself in my hands for two … Read more
The doctor said he would have me on my feet in two weeks. “ “And did he?” “Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Patient: “Doctor, do you think that I shall live until I am ninety?” Doctor: “How old are you now?” Patient: “Forty. “ Doctor: “Do you drink, gamble, smoke or do you have any other vice?” Patient: “No. I don’t drink. I don’t gamble. I don’t smoke. I have no vice. “ Doctor: “Then why do … Read more
A man was strolling along a beach in California. On giving the sand a kick he struck a corked bottle. He bent down, picked it up and removed the cork. Immediately, a Genie came out of the bottle and said to him, “Master, I have been a prisoner in this bottle for a thousand years … Read more