An elderly man went t o his doctor and said: “Doc, I think I’m getting senile. Several times lately, I have forgotten to zip up. “ “That’s not senility, “replied the doctor. “Senility is when you forget to zip down. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
A man was in a terrible accident, and his ‘manhood’ was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn’t cover the surgery since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $3,500 for ‘small,$6,500 for ‘medium, … Read more
An older gent had an appointment to see a urologist who shared an office with several other doctors. The waiting room was filled with patients. He approached the receptionist desk. The receptionist was a large imposing woman who looked like a wrestler. He gave her his name. In a very loud voice the receptionist said, … Read more
An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. “I have good news and bad news, “the owner replied. “The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told … Read more
During his physical, the doctor asked the patient about his daily activity level. He described a typical day this way: ‘Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded along the edge of a lake, drank eight beers, escaped from wild dogs in the heavy brush, jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake, marched up and down several rocky hills, … Read more
Doctor: “Would you have the money if I said you needed an operation?” Patient: “Would you say I needed an operation if you thought I didn’t have the money?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A 90-year-old man goes for a physical and all of his tests come back normal. The doctor says, “Larry, everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?” Larry replies, “God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight, so He’s fixed it so when I … Read more
An elderly man went to the doctor for a visit. “Doc, “he says, “I am so stricken. I have chest pains, headaches, back pains, nausea, arthritis, constipation, stomach cramps, earaches, burning in the eyes, congested lungs… “ “Sir, “says the doctor, “you complain you have so many things. What don’t you have?” The man answers, … Read more
A man was brought to a hospital with heavily fractured bones. The doctor in the intensive care unit asks him, “Are you married?” “No, I’ve been run over by a truck. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man tells his doctor that his wife has laryngitis. The doctor said there was nothing he could do to cure it. The man said, “Cure it, I want to prolong it!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.