A politician went to see the doctor to get the results of his brain scan. The doctor said: “Sir, I have some bad news for you. First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side. “ The politician interrupted, “Well, that’s normal, isn’t it? I thought everybody … Read more
Doc, says Steve, “I want to be castrated. “ “What on Earth for?” “It’s something I’ve been thinking about for a long time. If you don’t do it, I’ll just go to another doctor. “ “OK, but it’s against my better judgment. “ Steve has his operation. The next day he walks down the hospital … Read more
“Doctor, I have a problem… “ “What’s your problem?” “I pee in my sleep, every night!” “Why?” “Oh, well… Every night, a little dwarf visits me in my sleep and asks me; “Did we pee today?”. “And, that’s it? The solution is so simple. . Listen to me! If the little dwarf comes again you’re … Read more
An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, “Your … Read more
A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctors hadn’t told him about, he finally got enough energy to … Read more
Patient: “Doctor, I am feeling much better now. Please give me your bill. “ Doctor: “Be calm. You are not strong enough for this yet. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man walks into a bar and says, “Bartender, give me two shots. “ Bartender says, “You want them both now or one at a time?” The guy says, “Oh, I want them both now. One’s for me and one’s for this little guy here, “and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of … Read more
Guy takes his wife to the Doctor… The Doc says, “Well, it’s either Alzheimer’s disease or AIDS. “ “What do you mean?” The guy says, “You can’t tell the difference?” “Yeah, the two look a lot alike in the early stages… Tell you what. . Drive her way out into the country, kick her out … Read more
A man went to the doctor, “Doctor, every night in my dream I am playing soccer. “ Doctor says, “Take these pills, they will help you sleep better. “ The man said, “I can’t take them, tonight is the final game. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more
On the first day of the deer hunting season, a hunter fell out of a deer stand and broke both his legs. “Why couldn’t this happen on my last day of hunting?!” the hunter cried to the doctor. “It did, “the doctor replied. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more