A man sat at a local bar and said, “This is a special day, I’m celebrating. “ “What a coincidence, “said the woman next to him. “I’m celebrating, too, “she replied, clinking glasses with him. “What are you celebrating?” “I’m a chicken farmer, and for years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally … Read more
Paddy and his two friends are talking at a bar. His first friend says: “I think my wife is having an affair with the electrician. The other day I came home and found wire cutters under our bed and they weren’t mine. “ His second friend says: “I think my wife is having an affair … Read more
“This guy sees a sign in front of a house: “Talking Dog for Sale. “ He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a black mutt just sitting there. “You talk?” he asks. “Yep, “the mutt replies. “So, what’s your … Read more
A noble goes hunting with his servant. They haven’t gotten far from the house when the noble realizes that the ground is muddy and ruining his shoes. The noble tells the servant: “I’m going to wait here, run back to the house and bring me my riding boots”. The servant, seizing the moment, runs into … Read more
A hunter visited another hunter and was given a tour of his home. In the den was a stuffed lion. The visiting hunter asked, “When did you bag him?” The host said proudly, “That was three years ago, when I went hunting with my ex-wife. “ “What’s he stuffed with, “asked the visiting hunter. “My … Read more
A Jamaican man bought a round of drinks for everyone in the bar, announcing that his wife had just given birth to “a typical Jamaican baby boy weighing 20 pounds. “ Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of “Wow!” were heard. A woman fainted due to sympathy pains. Two weeks later, he … Read more
A farmer was sitting in the neighborhood bar getting hammered. A man came in and asked the farmer, “Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day, getting drunk?” The farmer shook his head and replied, “Some things you just can’t explain. “ “So what happened that’s so horrible?” the man asked as he … Read more
In Noah’s ark, on the third day the animals could no longer hold their sexual desire, so they started having sex with one another. But Noah got really angry cause the Ark started shaking dangerously and he decided that it was time to put things in order. So he ordered that every male should get … Read more
A man takes his wife to the stock show. They start heading down the alley that had the bulls. They came up to the first bull and his sign stated: “This bull mated 50 times last year. “ The wife turns to her husband and says, “He mated 50 times in a year, you could … Read more