Two students talk: “What are you reading?” “Quantum physics theory book. “ “But why are you reading it upside-down?” “It makes no difference anyway. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
The basketball coach stormed into the university president’s office and demanded a raise right then and there. “Please, “protested the college president, “you already make more than the entire History department. “ “Yeah, maybe so, but you don’t know what I have to put up with, “the coach blustered. “Look. “ He went out into … Read more
A middle aged woman was driving through a school zone when a policeman pulled her over for speeding. As he was giving her the ticket, she said, “How come I always get a ticket and everyone else gets a warning? Is it my face?” “No, ma’am, “explained the officer, “it’s your foot. “ This joke … Read more
Through the pitch-black night, the captain of a vessel sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship. He sends a signal: “Change your course ten degrees east. “ The light signals back: “Change yours, ten degrees west. “ Angry, the captain sends: “I’m a Navy captain! Change your course, sir!” “I’m … Read more
A professor was walking along a very narrow street when he came face to face with a rival professor. The street was too narrow for two to pass. The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said haughtily: “I never make way for fools!” Smiling, the professor stepped aside and said: “I always do. … Read more
Little Johnny was in class and the teacher announced that they were going to try something different to help everyone get to know each other a little better, and to help with their spelling. She explained, “I want you to stand up and give us the occupation of your father, spell it, and say one … Read more
Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff-legged and walking slowly. One student said to his friend: “I’m sure that poor old man has Peltry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that. “ The other student says: “No, I don’t … Read more
An English professor complained to the pet shop proprietor, “The parrot I purchased uses improper language. “ “I’m surprised, “said the owner. “I’ve never taught that bird to swear. “ “Oh, it isn’t that, “explained the professor. “But yesterday I heard him split an infinitive. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of … Read more
Three men were using the urinals in a public restroom in DC. The first man finished relieving himself, zipped up, strolled to the sinks and proceeded to wash his hands, using plenty of soap and water and doing a splendidly thorough job. As he was drying his hands (with lots of paper towels), he loftily … Read more
A Medical University mortician student walked into the embalming room where a cadaver was lying on the table. Confident that he knew enough now to begin the procedure without his instructor, he began to examine the body. When he rolled it over, he was shocked to see a cork in the man’s butt. Mystified, he … Read more