Being airborne approximately thirty minutes on an outbound evening flight from Dublin the lead flight attendant nervously made the following announcement in her lovely Irish brogue: “Ladies and gentlemen, I’m so very sorry, but it appears that there has been a terrible mix-up… one minute prior to take-off, by our catering service… , I don’t … Read more
Explaining luggage regulations to passengers can be aggravating for flight attendants. One day a woman tried to board with an enormous bag. The lead flight attendant told her why it would not fit, but the woman argued that her bag was a carry-on because it had wheels and a handle. Without blinking the attendant said, … Read more
A man jumps from a plane and as he descends pulls his parachute only nothing happens so he pulls his reserve and still no luck so as he contemplates flapping his arms like a bird when he spies a man coming up towards him. Calling out to the man “Do you know anything about parachutes?” … Read more
A man checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely. He thought, “I’ll call one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when you’re calling for a cab. “ He popped into a phone booth near the hotel and found an ad for a girl calling herself Ergonique, … Read more
Kid to a pregnant girl at bus stop: “What are you expecting?” The girl says, “A bus. “ The kid turns to his friend and says: “Wow! I am 100% sure this chick got screwed by a Transformer!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
During the ‘rush hour’ at Houston’s Hobby Airport, a flight was delayed due to a mechanical problem. Since they needed the gate for another flight, the aircraft was backed away from the gate while the maintenance crew worked on it. The passengers were then told the new gate number, which was some distance away. Everyone … Read more
Two Italian men get on a bus… They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: “Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two … Read more
On a senior citizens bus tour, while the passengers were unloading to do some sightseeing, one elderly lady stopped and whispered in the driver’s ear. She said, “Driver, I believe that I was sexually harassed!” The driver didn’t think much of her complaint, but promised he would check into it soon. Later, that same day, … Read more
Murphy the bus driver is sitting in his cab when his supervisor comes along. “Hello, Murphy, “he says. “What time did you pull out this morning?’ “I didn’t, “replies Murphy. “And I’ve been worrying about it all day.’” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.