After a lady’s car had leaked motor oil on her cement driveway, she bought a large bag of cat litter to soak it up. It worked so well, that she went back to the store to get another bag to finish the job. The clerk remembered her. Looking thoughtfully at her purchase, he said, “Lady, … Read more
There were two cows standing in the field, one cow says to the other: “boy that mad cow disease has got me worried” the other cow says I’m not worried, I’m a penguin” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A city man was tooling down a country road when his car sputtered to a complete stop near a field filled with cows. The driver, getting out to see what was the matter, noticed one of the cows looking at him. “I believe it’s your radiator, “said the cow. The man nearly jumped right out … Read more
Erica is walking out of a movie theater at the same time as a man with a parrot on his shoulder. Erica turns to the man and says, “Your parrot actually seemed to understand the movie. It looked around during the boring parts, it paid close attention to the dramatic parts, it even squawked during … Read more
Kerry the tomcat was scampering all over the neighborhood – down alleys, up fire escapes, into cellars. A disturbed neighbor knocked on the owner’s door and said, “Your cat is rushing about like mad. ““I know, “the man conceded. “Kerry’s just been neutered, and he’s running around canceling engagements. “ This joke is included in … Read more
Some race horses stay in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record. “In the last 16 races, I’ve won 8 of them!” Another horse breaks in, “Well in the last 27 races, I’ve won 20! !” “Oh that’s good, but in the last 36 races, I’ve won 29!” says another, … Read more
One day a man is walking down the street when he sees an old man with a nice looking dog. He goes over to the man and asks, “Does your dog bite?” The old man replies “No never”. When the man bends down to stroke the dog, it immediately takes a snap at his hand. … Read more
A guy walks into a bar and asks, “Who owns that Doberman tied up outside?” A man replies, “That’s my dog”. “Well, “says the first man, “I think my Chihuahua killed him. “ “Your Chihuahua killed my Doberman?How’d he do that???” asks the man at the bar. “I’m not quite sure. I think he got … Read more
Two men were walking down the street when they saw a dog licking himself. One man said “I wish I could do that. “ The other man said “You should probably just pet him first. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man went to visit a friend and was amazed to find him playing chess with his dog. He watched the game in astonishment for a while. “I can hardly believe my eyes!” he exclaimed. “That’s the smartest dog I’ve ever seen. “ “Nah, he’s not so smart, “the friend replied. “I’ve beaten him three … Read more