A family’s driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son’s innocence, the mother turns around and says, “Don’t worry, dear. That was just an insect. “ “Wow, “the boy replies. “I’m surprised it could get off the ground with a … Read more
Two hunters were dragging their dead deer back to their car. Another hunter approached and talked to them. “Hey, I don’t want to tell you how to do something… but I can tell you that it’s much easier if you drag the deer in the other direction. Then the antlers won’t dig into the ground. … Read more
A man and a woman are lying in bed, watching the ceiling and keeping quiet. What are they thinking? The woman thinks, “He keeps quiet. He doesn’t want to talk. Maybe he’s getting tired of me. He doesn’t love me anymore. He’s probably got someone else. I see. We’ll have to separate from each other. … Read more
“Your Honor, it was an accident! I had to run into the fence to keep from hitting the cow!” “Was it a Jersey cow?” “I don’t know, I didn’t see her license plate!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
An airman in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, “Wanna hear a marine joke?” The guy next to him replies, “Well, before you tell that joke, you should know something. I’m 6′ tall, 200 lbs, and I’m a marine. The guy sitting next to me is 6’2” tall, weighs … Read more
Black man found a bottle in the desert, opened it and the genie flew out: “Ask for what you want – I’ll fulfill three of your wishes!” “I want to be white, often see nude women, and that I will always be full of water!” Genie waved his hand and turned the black man to … Read more
An old man approaches the window of a cinema with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for two tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him. He replies, “Well, my pet chicken, of course!” “I’m sorry, “The girl tells him. “We can’t allow animals in the cinema. … Read more
An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman’s head. “Yech!” says the woman. “Get some toilet paper. “ “What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
An astronomer, a physicist and a mathematician are on a train in Scotland. The astronomer looks out of the window, sees a black sheep standing in a field, and remarks, “How odd. Scottish sheep are black. “ “No, no, no!” says the physicist. “Only some Scottish sheep are black. “ The mathematician rolls his eyes … Read more
A man was traveling north to Dallas. He needed to use the bathroom and so at a rest stop he goes into a stall. He sits down and was surprised to hear someone in the next stall say, “So how ya doing?” The man gulps and thinks about what he should say and then decides … Read more