A woman didn’t come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. A man didn’t come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had … Read more
A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going, and she replied, “I’m going to Las Vegas. “ He questioned her as to why and she told him, “I just found out that I can make … Read more
A director’s wife hears that her husband has a new secretary. The director comes home and the wife starts putting questions: “Does this new secretary of yours have nice legs?” “I don’t know. “ “What color do her eyes have?” “I didn’t notice… “ “But about dressing, how does she dress?” “Very fast… “ This … Read more
As a man serviced an alarm system at a jewelry store recently, the saleswoman let him know that the store was having a 20 percent off sale. “I bet your girlfriend would love it if you bought her something, “she suggested. “I don’t have a girlfriend, “he answered. “No girlfriend? Why not?” “My wife won’t … Read more
Old man O’Malley had worked down at the brewery for years, but one day he just wasn’t paying attention and he tripped on the walkway and fell over into the beer vat and drowned. The foreman thought it should be his job to inform the widow O’Malley of her old man’s death. He showed up … Read more
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful, “he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going … Read more
A wee guy was sitting at a bar staring at his drink for ages. Suddenly, a big biker came along, snatched his glass, guzzled down the contents and laughed, “Hah! So what are you gonna do about that, little man?” “Nothing, “sighed the little guy despondently. “You see, today has been the worst day of … Read more
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, “Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?” “Why do you want … Read more
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He asks, “What was that for?” She says, “I found a piece of paper in your pocket with ‘Betty Sue’ written on it. “ He says, “Jeez, honey, remember … Read more
Wife: “Whatcha doing?” Husband: “Nothing. “ Wife: “You did that yesterday. “ Husband: “I wasn’t finished. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.