A young couple is out for a romantic Valentine’s Day walk along a country lane. They walk hand in hand and as they stroll, the lad’s lustful desire rises to a peak. He is just about to get frisky when she says, “I hope you don’t mind, but I really do need to take a … Read more
Little lad is sitting between his Mum and Dad on the sofa and they are playing a game about what sounds animals say. His Mum says “What does a duck say Tommy?” He says”Quack quack Mummy. “ His Mum says “Very good Tommy,that’s right. “ She says “What does a dog say?” He says “Woof … Read more
A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says “You can’t bring that dog in here!” The guy, without missing a beat, says “This is my seeing-eye dog. “ “Oh man, “the bartender says, “I’m sorry, here, the first one’s on … Read more
The King and Queen decided to get pets, and for this reason the King issued a decree: “Handsome reward for finest Royal pets. “ The Queen immediately falls in love with a white, kitten with long hair bred in a faraway land. Some time after payment, the kitten disappears and the distraught Queen sends the … Read more
There was a man driving a pickup truck down a country road, when suddenly he was broadsided by a trailer truck. Some time went by, and the case got to court. The defense attorney said to the plaintiff, “How can you be suing my client now when you told a trooper after the accident that … Read more
A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown. She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep. She goes up to the farmer and asks, “If I guess how many sheep you have, can I have one?” The farmer nodded. She continued. “127” The farmer is surprised. “How … Read more
“Your Honor, it was an accident! I had to run into the fence to keep from hitting the cow!” “Was it a Jersey cow?” “I don’t know, I didn’t see her license plate!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet. The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her … Read more
A man is walking home when he sees a dog buying meat for his owner. The man watches the dog when the butcher takes a little too much and growls at him until he gets the right amount. The man follows the dog and watches as the dog stands on two legs and helps an … Read more
A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It’s about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, “Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a bitch outta here. It’s going to bite one of my customers and I’m going to get sued. “ The guy says, “No no no, it’s a … Read more