A drunk sitting at a bar observes a very snobby woman participating in a wine tasting contest. She was very good at identifying the wine. At the first taste she says: “Cabernet Sauvignon, 1998” and all the people were amazed. At the 2nd try she answered “Cabernet Sauvignon, 1953” and they were once again amazed. … Read more
A woman is approaching a small bar. She calls the barkeeper and when he is standing in front of her she asks him in a very seductive way to come nearer. Then she bends over the desk and starts to caress his beard. “Are you the boss of this bar?” she asks and touches his … Read more
So one day, Gramma sent her grandson Johnny down to the water hole to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes looking back at him. He dropped the bucket and hightailed it for Gramma’s kitchen. “Well now, where’s my bucket and where’s my water?” … Read more
An alien walks into a bar and sits next to a drunk guy and begins poking him in the shoulder. The drunk guy just ignores him. After a while the guy turns to the alien and begins looking him up and down. He notices that the alien has no genitalia. He then asks “You guys … Read more
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve noble gasses here. “ He doesn’t react. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Man to a woman: “Do you know the difference between a blowjob and a cheeseburger?” Woman: “No. “ Man: “Let’s have lunch sometime…” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A tourist in Sweden is drinking in a bar when a very sexy woman sits next to him. ‘Hello,’ he says. ‘Do you speak English?’ ‘Oh I speaking not much English,’ replies the woman. ‘How much?’ asks the man. The woman replies, ‘200 Kroner.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
A chemist, a physicist, and a mathematician are stranded on an island when a can of food rolls ashore. The chemist and the physicist come up with many ingenious ways to open the can. Then suddenly the mathematician gets a bright idea: “Assume we have a can opener… “ This joke is included in the … Read more
Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. The first one says, “My Daddy is so cool he can eat four Burgers at one meal. “ The second one says, “That’s nothing. My Daddy can eat six. “ Little Johnny starts laughing and says, “My Daddy can eat light … Read more
A Jewish man walks into a bar and sits down. He has a few drinks, then he sees a Chinese man and punches him in the face. “Owch!” the Chinese man says. “What was that for?” “That was for Pearl Harbor, “the Jewish man says. “But I’m Chinese!” “Chinese, Japanese, what’s the difference?” And the … Read more