Two men were shipwrecked on an island. They decided to venture inland to see if they could find someone. The men came across a village in the middle of a jungle, immediately they were surrounded by a tribe of islanders. The chief walks to the men and says, “What do you choose, Death or Boogaloo?” … Read more
A guy went to a whore house and asked the lady if she had a woman that could handle 16 inches. “Hmm, “said the madam. “I’m not sure. Try the first door on the right. “ So the guy went inside, stuck it in, and immediately heard screams. “It’s too big! Take it out!” So … Read more
A guy walks into an elevator and stands next to a beautiful woman. After a few minutes he turns to her and says, “Can I smell your pussy?” The woman looks at him in disgust and says, “Certainly not!” “Hmmm, “he replies. “It must be your feet, then. “ This joke is included in the … Read more
A guy walks into a pharmacy and buys a pack of condoms. The cashier asks him if he wants a bag. He responds, “No, she’s not that ugly. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Three old men were sitting around talking about who had the worst health problems. The seventy-year-old said, “Have I got a problem?Every morning I get up at 7:30 and have to take a piss, but I have to stand at the toilet for an hour ’cause my pee barely trickles out. “ “Heck, that’s nothing, … Read more
A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, “Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?” She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually the lady asks, “Aren’t you gonna bite them?” He replies, … Read more
Two eggs boiling in a pan. One says, “I’ve got a huge crack. “ The other replies, “Stop teasing me, I’m not fucking hard yet. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man joins the navy and is shipped out immediately to an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The captain is showing the new recruit around the ship, when the recruit asks the captain what the sailors do to satisfy their urges when they’re at sea for so long. “Let me show … Read more
There once was a pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant. “It’s in case I get shot. I don’t want you crew members to see blood … Read more
Brian received a call from a recruitment lady. She said to him: “Sir, I have two openings for you. “ Brian: “Yes I Know. “ *Awkward silence* She: “Asshole” Brian: “I prefer the other one. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.