Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, “Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn’t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. “By the time I was 50, I could … Read more
“Oh, I sure am glad to see you, “the little boy said to his grandmother on his mother’s side. “Now Daddy will do the trick he’s been promising us. “ The grandmother was curious. “What trick is that?” she asked. “He told Mommy that he’d climb the walls if you came to visit, “answered the … Read more
In the High Court: “Do you know what you get for false testimony?” “Yes, they promised me a Mercedes… “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two drunks are sitting side by side in a bar. One of the drunks goes to the bathroom but neglects to button up his fly when he’s finished. He staggers back to the bar, sits on a bar stool, and his penis flops out on the bartop. The other drunk yells, ‘Snake!’ and hits the … Read more
A really bad impressionist walks into a bar. The bartender says, “Why the wrong face?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Three old guys are out walking. First one says, “Windy, isn’t it?” Second one says, “No, it’s Thursday!” Third one says, “So am I. Let’s go get a beer. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: “What gift would you like to receive during St. Valentine’s Day?” “Well, I don’t know” she answers shyly. “OK, I ‘ll give you another year to think about it…” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A cowboy rides in the desert and comes upon a Native American lying naked with a hard-on. He asks, “What are you doing?” The naked man replies, “I’m finding out the time — it is 12:15. “ The cowboy looks at his watch and thinks, “Wow, it really is 12:15. “ The cowboy continues and … Read more
Two lawyers are walking down the road when they see a beautiful woman walking towards them. ‘What a babe,’ one says. ‘I’d sure like to screw her!’ ‘Really?’ replies the other. ‘Out of what?’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A policeman has just stopped a drunk driver and given him a breathalyzer test. ‘I’m sorry, sir,’ says the policeman. ‘But this bag tells me you’ve been drinking too much.’ ‘What a coincidence!’ exclaims the driver. ‘I’ve got a bag at home that does exactly the same thing! ‘ This joke is included in the … Read more