Pure Dynamite
Husband admiring his body in the mirror says to wife “Look at that, 14 stones of pure dynamite !” Wife replies “yeah, shame about the 2 inch fuse… “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Marriage
Halftime Switch Sides
A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, “What in the world was that?” He replies, “Touchdown. I’m winning, seven nothing. “ She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, “What was that?” She replies, “Touchdown, tie score. “ He wants to get her back, … Read more
Broken Jaw
A man is in a bar talking to his friend. “Last night, while I was out drinking, a burglar broke into my house. “ “Did he get anything?”asks his friend. “Yes, “says the man. “A broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken ribs. My wife thought it was me coming home … Read more
Millionaire Crafty Devil
A 60-year-old millionaire has just married a 20-year-old model. “You crafty old devil, “says his friend. ‘How did you manage to get a lovely young wife like that?’ “Easy, “replies the millionaire. “I told her I was 92. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Well Next
Wife: I have blisters on my hands from using the broom all day. Husband: Well next time take the car then silly. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Why the Groom Wears Black – Elderly Ladies
Two elderly ladies were discussing the upcoming dance at the country club. “We’re supposed to wear something that matches our husband’s hair, so I’m wearing black, “said Mrs. Smith. “Oh my, “said Mrs. Jones, “I’d better not go. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Attitude Changed
The husband was not home at his usual hour, and the wife was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00a.m. she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was her husband, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs. … Read more
Officer Finished
A man and his wife, both recently retired, went into town to buy some milk and bread. They were only in the store for about five minutes, but when they came out, they noticed a police officer writing a parking ticket, clearly about to place it on their car. “Come on, man, how about giving … Read more
Priest Responded
Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?” “I think so, “the man replied. “My wife has made all the appetizers herself and we have a caterer coming in to provide plenty of sandwiches and cakes for all of our … Read more
Results Thursday
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages. When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife. After two hours, she stopped nagging and said, “How would you like … Read more