Four nuns are in line to go into heaven. God asks the first nun if she has ever sinned. She says, “Well, I’ve seen a penis. “So God puts holy water on her eyes and lets her enter. He asks the second nun the same thing and she says, “I’ve held a penis, “so he … Read more
Lawyer: “Your Honor, I wish to appeal my client’s case on the basis of newly discovered evidence. “Judge: “And what is the nature of the new evidence?” Lawyer: “I have discovered that my client still has money. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A young lawyer, defending a businessman in a lawsuit, feared he was losing the case and asked his senior partner if he should send a box of cigars to the judge to curry favor. The senior partner was horrified. “The judge is an honorable man, “he said, “If you do that, I guarantee you’ll lose … Read more
One day there was a blind man walking down the street and he smelled oranges, so he bought some fruit. He smelled some pastries, so he bought some donuts. Then he walked past a fish market, took a hard sniff, and said, “Hello ladies!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar. The bartender goes to investigate why the drunk is screaming. “What’s all the screaming in there?” he yells. “You’re scaring … Read more
Jim was having a shit in the train toilet today, when some bloke knocked on the door. He said, “Can I see your ticket please?” “Not right now” Jim shouted, “I’m having a shit!” He said, “I don’t believe you, can you pass it under the door?” “No problem, “Jim said, sliding it under. “The … Read more
An FBI agent was interviewing a bank teller after the bank had been robbed 3 times by the same bandit: “Did you notice anything special about the man?” asks the agent. “Yes, “replied the teller. “He was better dressed each time. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more
A police chief, a fire chief, and a city attorney were traveling together by car to a municipal management conference in a distant city. Their car broke down in a rural area, and they were forced to seek shelter for the night at a nearby farmhouse. The farmer welcomed them in, but cautioned them that … Read more
A lawyer awoke from surgery, and noticed that all the blinds in his room were closed. He asked a nurse, “Why are all the blinds drawn?” The nurse answered, “Well, there’s a fire across the street, and we didn’t want you to think you had died. “ This joke is included in the Black Book … Read more
Roger was buying an expensive bracelet, to surprise his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day, at a very smart jeweler’s shop. The jeweler inquired, “Would you like your girlfriend’s name engraved on it?” Roger thought for a moment, grinned, then answered, “No, instead engrave ‘To my one and only love’. “ The jeweler smiled and said, “Yes, … Read more