Glass Eye

Two men are drinking in a bar. One turns to the other and says, “I bet you $100 that I can bite my eye!” The second fellow thinks to himself, I guess he’s had about enough, so he replies, “OK, you’re on. “The first man takes out his glass eye and bites it. So the … Read more

Credit Cards

When a fellow called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room, the clerk told him that the rates depended on room size and number of people. “Do you take children?” the man asked. “No, sir, “replied the clerk. “Only cash and credit cards. “ This joke is included in the Black … Read more

Someone’s Deodorant Isn’t

It was a really hot day at the office due to a malfunction with the air conditioning system. There were about twenty people in close quarters and everyone was sweating, even with a fan on. All of a sudden, people started to wrinkle their noses at an odor passing through the air. It was the … Read more

Hunters Safety Course

There were two hunters who had never hunted before, so they took a hunters safety course. In this course it was stressed that if you ever got lost in the woods, firing three shots in the air was the universal signal that you needed help. The very first day of hunting the two hunters became … Read more

Down John Whispers

Two friends Jack and John go to the bank, when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line-up the customers, including the two friends, up against a wall and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables. While this is going on Jack jams something … Read more

Roulette Table Maybe

A lady is having a bad day at the roulette tables in Vegas. She’s down to her last $50. Exasperated, she exclaims to the whole table, “What rotten luck I’ve had today! What in the world should I do now?” A man standing next to her suggests, “I don’t know, why don’t you play your … Read more

Famous Blarney Stone

A group of Americans was touring Ireland. One of the women in the group was constantly complaining. The bus seats are uncomfortable. The food is terrible. It’s too hot. It’s too cold. The accommodations are awful. The group arrived at the site of the famous Blarney Stone. “Good luck will be following you all your … Read more

Co-Workers Noticed

A man arrived at work one morning wearing a good sized diamond ring. One of his co-workers noticed the sparkler and asked about it. The man explained, “My mother-in-law gave me a thousand dollars before she passed away. She said that when she dies, I should buy a beautiful stone. So I did!” This joke … Read more

Boxed Puzzle

Four young ladies are ordering a few rounds of drinks. Each time they get up, they toast and say, “14 weeks!”, then they down their drinks. The bartender finally asks the ladies, “What’s the deal?” One says, “Well, we bought a boxed puzzle. It said ‘two to six years,’ and we did it in 14 … Read more

Elephant Tim

Tim: I wish I had the money to buy an elephant. Tom: What do you want with an elephant? Tim: Nothing, I just want the money. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.