A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor’s office, the man followed instructions,undressed, and bent over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he … Read more
The manager hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. While leaving the room, she courteously said, “Oh, sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?” He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down … Read more
The patient staggered to the pharmacy counter flinching. “Say, would you give me something for my head?” The pharmacist looked up. “Why? What would I do with it?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A young woman brings her fiancé home to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about the young man, so the father invites the fiancé to his study for a chat. “So what are your plans?” the father asks the young man. “I am a Torah scholar, “he replies. … Read more
One day, after a man had his annual physical, the doctor came out and said, “You had a great checkup. Is there anything that you’d like to talk about or ask me?” “Well, “he said, “I was thinking about getting a vasectomy. “ “That’s a pretty big decision. Have you talked it over with your … Read more
“Doctor, Doctor, You’ve got to help me – I just can’t stop my hands shaking!” “Do you drink a lot?” “Not really – I usually spill most of it!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A surgeon was checking on a patient who had a hernia operation three days before. The doctor asked the man why he had not gotten out of bed. “I hurt, “the man said. “You don’t know how it feels. “ “I know exactly how it feels, “the doctor said. “I had the same procedure last … Read more
Patient: “I’m in a hospital! Why am I here?” Doctor: “You’ve had an accident involving a bus. “ Patient: “What happened?” Doctor: “Well, I’ve got some good news and some bad news. Which would you like to hear first?” Patient: “Give me the bad news first. “ Doctor: “Your legs were injured so badly that … Read more
A doctor told his patient after reviewing his x-rays he needed surgery costing $5000. 00. The patient said he only had $500. 00 and what could be done. The doctor said, “Well, I can always touch-up your x-rays. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man walks into the psychiatrist’s office with a zucchini up his nose, a cucumber in his left ear, and a breadstick in his right ear. He says, “Doctor, what is wrong with me?” The psychiatrist replies, “You are not eating properly. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more