The boss had listened in sympathetic silence as Theodor went through the reasons why he needed, and felt he deserved, a raise. Then, with a compassionate smile, the CEO patted the younger man on the shoulder. “Yes, Teo, “he said kindly, “I know you can’t get married on the salary I’m paying you… and someday … Read more
A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He said: “The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn’t my wife!” The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added: “And that woman was my mother!” Laughter and applause. A week later, a top manager trained by … Read more
Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her math classes: “A wealthy man dies and leaves ten million dollars. One-fifth is to go to his wife, one-fifth is to go to his son, one-sixth to his butler, and the rest to charity. Now, what does each get?” After a … Read more
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic. “Here is the situation, “she said. “A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can’t swim, and … Read more
An elderly American couple went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker explained to the husband that, “You can have her shipped home for $5,000 or you can have her buried here in the Holy Land for $150”. The man thought about it and told him that he … Read more
A woman was worried whether or not her dead husband made it to heaven, so she decided to try to contact his spirit by having a seance. Sure enough, after the usual mumbo-jumbo of calling to the spirits, her husband’s voice was heard answering, “Hello Margaret, this is meeee… “ “Fred, “she answered. I just … Read more
Recently a “Husband Shopping Center” opened, where women could go to choose a husband from among many men. It was laid out with five floors, with the men increasing in positive attributes as you ascended up the floors. The only rule was once you opened the door to any floor, you must choose a man … Read more
As a painless way to save money, a young couple arranged that every time they have sex, the husband put his pocket change into a china piggy bank on the bedside table. One night, while being unusually athletic, he accidentally knocked the bank to the floor where it smashed. To his surprise, among the masses … Read more
“I’m sorry, “said the clerk in the flower shop, “we don’t have potted geraniums. Could you use African violets instead?” The customer said sadly, “No, it was geraniums my wife told me to water while she was gone. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Two men are discussing their love lives. One says, “I’m getting married. I’m sick of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear. “ The other one says, “Hey, I’m getting divorced for the same reasons. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.