A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text, “If you are sleeping, send me your dreams. If you are laughing, send me your smile. If you are eating, send me a bite. If you are drinking, send me a sip. If you are crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
The husband, typically unromantic, replied,
“I am in the toilet. Please advise. “
This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.