While giving a physical the doctor noticed that his patient’s shins were covered with dark bruises. “Tell me, “said the doctor, “do you play hockey or soccer?” “Neither, “said the man. “My wife and I play bridge. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Five surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work. The first said, “I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered. “ The second said, “I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in … Read more
A man goes to a psychologist and says, “Doc I have a real problem, I can’t stop thinking about relations. “ The psychologist says, “Well let’s see what we can find out”, and pulls out his ink blots. “What is this a picture of?” he asks. The man turns the picture upside down then turns … Read more
“Doctor, doctor, I feel like a goat. “ “How long have you been like this?” “Since I was a kid. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
“Doctor, you told me I have a month to live and then you sent me a bill for $1,000! I can’t pay that before the end of the month!” “Okay, you have six months to live. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A lady goes into the hospital to have a very serious operation. While on the operating table and undergoing preparation, she flatlines and soon finds herself standing before St. Peter. She begins to wonder what she is doing there. “Are you sure that I’m supposed to be here, St. Peter?” St. Peter says: “Let me … Read more
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, “Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you. “ “I know, “said the man, “but … Read more
A young woman gazed up from her hospital bed at the very handsome doctor who was examining her chart. She fluttered her eyelids and said, “They tell me that you are a real lady killer. “ The doctor smiled and shook his head. “No, I make no distinction between the sexes. “ This joke is … Read more
The nurse burst into the doctor’s office. “Doctor!” she yelled, “you just gave a clean bill of health to Mr. Smith and … and he dropped dead right outside the door!” The doctor jumped into action. “Quick, “he said, “We’ve got to turn him around so it looks like he was just coming in!” This … Read more
An older man went to his doctor with a variety of complaints. After examining him, the doctor said, “Well, you’ve got some problems, all right, but if you’d give up smoking, drinking, and chasing women, I think you’d last a good while longer. “ “But Doc, “answered the man, “I don’t smoke, drink, or chase … Read more