A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. “Careful, “he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going … Read more
A wee guy was sitting at a bar staring at his drink for ages. Suddenly, a big biker came along, snatched his glass, guzzled down the contents and laughed, “Hah! So what are you gonna do about that, little man?” “Nothing, “sighed the little guy despondently. “You see, today has been the worst day of … Read more
Jim had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, “Pick four large ones out and throw them at me, will you?” “Why do you want … Read more
Wife: “Whatcha doing?” Husband: “Nothing. “ Wife: “You did that yesterday. “ Husband: “I wasn’t finished. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man is walking home late at night when he sees a woman in the shadows. “Twenty bucks, “she says. He’s never been with a hooker before, but he decides what the hell… They’re going at it for a couple minutes when all of a sudden a light flashes on them-it’s a police officer. “What’s … Read more
A man has five children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself that he starts calling his wife, “Mother of Five” in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it’s time to go home and wants to find out if his … Read more
Two old friends were chatting. One said to the other, “My 85th birthday was yesterday. The wife gave me an SUV. “ Other guy responded, “Wow, that’s amazing! Imagine that, an SUV… What a great gift!” “Yup! Socks, Underwear, and Viagra!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
A man came home from work one day to find his wife sitting on the front porch with her bags packed. He asked her where she was going, and she replied, “I’m going to Las Vegas. “ He questioned her as to why and she told him, “I just found out that I can make … Read more
Rita is complaining to her friends about her husband’s extreme dedication to his new job. You see, Rita’s husband has been jobless for quite a while. She tells her friends, “I appreciate the fact that at last he’s found a new job, but I don’t like him taking his work home and finishing it in … Read more
A man walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the guy started to leave. “Excuse me”, said a customer, who was puzzled over what the guy had done. “What was … Read more