A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, “Please, may I hide under your skirt. I’ll explain later. “ The nun agreed… A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, “Sister, have you seen a soldier?” The nun replied, “He went that way. “ After the MPs ran off, … Read more
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender approaches and tells him, “You know, a pint goes … Read more
A woman didn’t come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it. A man didn’t come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had … Read more
“Mom, can I buy some heels?” “No. “ Mom, can I buy a bra?” “No. “ “Mom, can I buy a dress?” “No. “ “Mom, can I buy a Barbie doll?” “No. You never let me buy anything!” “Shut up, Justin. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more
Wanting to have a quick love-making session, the couple told their eight year old son to go stand on the balcony with a popsicle and to report to them all the neighborhood activities. He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into action. “There’s a car being towed from the parking lot, “he … Read more
A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he … Read more
A director’s wife hears that her husband has a new secretary. The director comes home and the wife starts putting questions: “Does this new secretary of yours have nice legs?” “I don’t know. “ “What color do her eyes have?” “I didn’t notice… “ “But about dressing, how does she dress?” “Very fast… “ This … Read more
As a man serviced an alarm system at a jewelry store recently, the saleswoman let him know that the store was having a 20 percent off sale. “I bet your girlfriend would love it if you bought her something, “she suggested. “I don’t have a girlfriend, “he answered. “No girlfriend? Why not?” “My wife won’t … Read more
Old man O’Malley had worked down at the brewery for years, but one day he just wasn’t paying attention and he tripped on the walkway and fell over into the beer vat and drowned. The foreman thought it should be his job to inform the widow O’Malley of her old man’s death. He showed up … Read more