An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time in a bar, so one night he took her along with him. “What’ll you have?” he asked. “Oh, I don’t know. The same as you I suppose, “she replied. So, the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel’s and threw his down … Read more
A funeral service is held for a woman who just passed away. As the pallbearers carry the casket out, they accidentally bump into a wall. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive. She lives for 10 more years and then dies. They have another funeral … Read more
A newly-wed couple didn’t know the difference between putty and Vaseline. A week after the marriage all their windows fell out. Which was the least of their worries. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Wife and husband bought condoms with different flavors. Darling, I will turn off the light, put one on and you guess the flavor. As soon as he turns off the light, she takes it in the mouth and says: “Gorgonzola!” “Wait, it is not on yet. “ This joke is included in the Black Book … Read more
Two women meet: “Me and my husband are no longer together… “ “Why?” “Well, could you live with a person who smokes weed, drinks, has no job and always cusses?” “No, of course I couldn’t!” “Well he couldn’t either!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Man to vicar: ‘Do you approve of sex before marriage?’ Vicar: ‘Not if it delays the service.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Johnny got into an embarrassing situation at a swingers’ party. He snuck up behind an older lady, started fucking her from behind then looked up and suddenly realised that the guy at the other end of the spitroast, getting a blowjob, was his dad. Johnny said, “After 30 years of marriage I can’t believe you’re … Read more
A husband feeling a bit horny goes to the bathroom and returns with aspirin and a glass of water for his wife. He says, “Here honey, here are some aspirin and some water. “ She replied, “but honey I do not have a headache!” He replied, “Thank God!” This joke is included in the Black … Read more
It’s the morning after the honeymoon. The wife says, “You know, you’re a really lousy lover. “ The husband replies, “How can you possibly tell that after only 30 seconds. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A man comes home from work early to find his blonde wife in bed with three men. Completely shocked, he shouts, “Hello, Hello, Hello!” The blonde whines, “What? No hello for me?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.