A ventriloquist is working in a small rural town and during his show a local stands up and yells, “Hey You! On Stage! You’ve been making smart-aleck remarks about us small-town folk being stupid all night long! We’re not all stupid, ya know!” “Relax” said the ventriloquist, “They’re just jokes!” “I’m not talking to you, … Read more
Paddy found a wallet with 50 pounds in it. He wasn’t sure how to proceed, but then he thought, “What would Jesus do?” So he turned it into wine. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Salesman: “Madam, do you want this powder?” Housewife: “For what?” Salesman: “For ants. “ Housewife: “No. If I give them powder today, they will ask for lipstick tomorrow. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
All the merry men and Maid Marion, gathered around Robin Hood’s deathbed, waiting for the inevitable end. Manfully, heroically, Robin struggled up and said “Friar Tuck, bring me my longbow. I will fire an arrow out the window and wherever it lands, that is where you will bury me. “ Deeply moved, they placed a … Read more
A merchant captain and several of his officers were returning to the ship after an evening of partying ashore. As they climbed the gangway, the captain threw up all over himself. Pointing to an apprentice seaman above, he shouted, “Give that man five days in the brig for vomiting!” The following morning the captain was … Read more
From a passenger ship one can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving his hands. “Who is it?” a passenger asks the captain. “I have no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes mad like that. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. … Read more
A sailor was swallowed by a whale and lived to tell the tale. When asked by a reporter what the scariest part was he answered, “The graffiti… someone wrote ‘Pinocchio was here. ‘“ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
In a greasy spoon, a downhearted diner asked the waitress for meatloaf and some kind words. She brought the meatloaf but didn’t say a thing. “Hey, “he said, “what about my kind word?” She replied, “Don’t eat the meatloaf. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more