A woman meant to call a record store but dialed the wrong number and got a private home instead. “Do you have ‘Eyes of Blue’ and ‘A Love Supreme’?” she asked. “Well, no, “answered the puzzled homeowner. “But I have a wife and eleven children. “ “Is that a record?” she inquired. “I don’t think … Read more
A wife went to the police station with her next door neighbor to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description. She said, “He’s 35 years old, 6 foot 4, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and is good to the children. “ … Read more
A woman was worried whether or not her dead husband made it to heaven, so she decided to try to contact his spirit by having a seance. Sure enough, after the usual mumbo-jumbo of calling to the spirits, her husband’s voice was heard answering, “Hello Margaret, this is meeee… “ “Fred, “she answered. I just … Read more
Her: At least invite me out to dinner. Him: I don’t go out with married women. Her: But I’m your wife. Him: I make no exceptions. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
An American couple visiting a German village stepped into a small shop to look for souvenirs. The woman sneezed. “Gesundheit, “said the clerk. “Charles, “said the American woman to her husband, “we’re in luck. There’s somebody here who speaks English. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it … Read more
A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man’s face. “What did you do that for?” the man asks. “Well, you don’t have the hiccups anymore do you?” The man says, “No, but my wife … Read more
A woman sitting at her deceased husband’s funeral. A man leans into her and asks, “Do you mind if I say a word?” “No, go right ahead, “the woman replies. The man stands and clears his throat, then says “Plethora” and sits back down. “Thanks, “the woman says, “that means a lot. “ This joke … Read more
A woman was walking in a graveyard when she saw a man kneeling by a grave shouting “Why did you have to die???” Feeling sorry for the man she put her hand on his arm and said “Is that your wife your grieving for?” To which the man replied, “No it’s my wife’s ex-husband” This … Read more
A man in the Florida supermarket tries to buy half a head of lettuce. The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce. The man persists and asks to see the manager. The boy says he’ll ask his manager about it. Walking into the back room, the boy said … Read more