Two women met in heaven who were previous acquaintances on earth. One said, “I can’t believe you’re here so soon, what happened?” She exclaimed, “I froze to death!” The other said, “That’s terrible, how’d it happen?” “Well I started shivering uncontrollably, fell asleep and here I am!” Then she asked how her friend died. She … Read more
A telephone rang. “Hello! Is your phone number 444-4444?” “Yes, it is, “came the reply. “Thank God! Could you call 911 for me? I super-glued my finger to the phone. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
The pastor of a local church was visited by a man evidently worse for liquor, and a young lady. She said to the minister, “Please, sir, we’ve come to be married. “ “I can’t marry you with this man in this condition, “said the clergyman. “Besides, haven’t you been here twice before, and haven’t I … Read more
Two friends die and one goes to Heaven while the other goes to Hell. The one that goes to Heaven begs the angel to let him visit his friend in Hell, and the angel agrees. He gets to Hell and sees his friend surrounded by beautiful women and alcohol everywhere. He says to his friend, … Read more
A man lying on his deathbed called to him, his lawyer, his doctor, and his pastor. “I am going to die tonight, “and I want to prove that when you go to heaven you can take it all with you. So to my three most trusted friends, you three of course, I am leaving 50,000 … Read more
There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away. It was an obsession. One Sunday was a picture perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no clouds in the sky, and the temperature was just right. The preacher was … Read more
Four nuns were attending a baseball game. Four men were sitting directly behind them. Because their habits were partially blocking the view, the men decided to badger the nuns hoping that they’d get annoyed enough to move to another area. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, “I think I’m going to move … Read more
Grumpy Old Man to his wife: “Why didn’t any of the books I donated sell at the church rummage sale?” His wife: “I’m thinking it may have gone better if you hadn’t torn out the pages you didn’t like. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more
A drunk asked a barman, “Who did you vote for in the last election?” “None of your business, “the barman answered, “And besides, you never talk politics in a pub. “ “Okay, “said the drunk. “What church do you go to?” “None of your business, “the barman answered, “And besides, you never talk about religion … Read more
A Rabbi and a Priest were sitting in front of a church and they each had charity boxes in front of them to collect money. The church goers that were passing by couldn’t believe the nerve of the rabbi, and purposely threw large sums of money into the priest’s charity box to spite the rabbi. … Read more