A man calls a lawyer’s office. A voice answers, ‘Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz.’ The man says, ‘Let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘I’m sorry, he’s on vacation.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s in a big case, not available for a week.’ ‘Okay, then, let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘Speaking.’ This joke … Read more
The boss speaking with the secretary: “Who told you that, if I kissed you a couple of times, you have the right to laze all day long?” “My lawyer. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes … Read more
Two brothers, Bob and George, both work for a lumberyard. One day, Bob tells George that he can tell what any piece of wood is just by smelling it. Unbelieving, George blindfolds Bob and proceeds to test the theory. The first piece of wood Bob smells, he instantly identifies as maple. The second piece Bob … Read more
A guy was meeting a friend in a bar, and as he walked in he noticed two pretty girls looking at him. He heard one girl say to the other, “Nine. “ Feeling pleased with himself, he swaggered over to his buddy at the bar and told him that the girl in the corner had … Read more
A man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the man, “Sorry, sir, but you’re only allowed one seat. “ The man groaned but didn’t budge. The usher became impatient. “Sir, if you don’t get up from there I’m going to … Read more
When the office printer color started to look a little off the manager called the local repair shop. To the manager’s surprise, the clerk said that it would cost $50 but that he might try reading the manual and doing it himself. The manager replied in astonishment, “Does your boss know that you discourage business … Read more
A young employee is working late at the office one evening. As he comes out of his office he sees the CEO standing by the classified document shredder in the hallway, a piece of paper in his hand. “Do you know how to work this thing?” the CEO asks. “My secretary’s gone home and I … Read more
Office executive “Sir, can I have a day off next week to visit my mother-in-law?” Boss “Certainly not!” Office executive “Thank you so much sir! I knew you would be understanding. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.