Thirty Cents

A guy goes into a bar and orders six shots of tequila and one beer chaser. The bartender lines up six shots and goes to get the beer. When he came back with the beer only moments later, all six shots were gone. The bartender says, “Wow! You sure drank those fast. “ The guy … Read more

Ant Twisted

A man was sent to prison for twenty years. He was so bored while in there; he found an ant and decided to teach it tricks – like beg, play dead, roll over, jump hair etc. He served his time and was released. He took his ant with him in a matchbox. The first place … Read more

Panda Bear

A panda bear walks into a bar and orders a sandwich. The waiter brings him the sandwich. The panda bear eats it, pulls out a pistol, kills the waiter, and gets up and starts to walk out. The bartender yells for him to stop. The panda bear asks, “What do you want?” The bartender replies, … Read more

Beer Jumps

A lady walks into a bar and sees a really cute guy sitting at the counter. She goes over and asks him what he is drinking. “Magic Beer”, he says. She thinks he’s a little crazy, so she walks around the bar, but after that there is no one else worth talking to,goes back to … Read more

Hey Honey

A beautiful woman sits next to a drunk in a bar. He turns to her and says, ‘Hey, honey. How about you and me getting it on? I’ve got a couple of pounds and it looks like you could use the money.’ The woman turns to him and says, ‘What makes you think I charge … Read more

Trouble Maybe Later

A young guy at a bar: “Hey, bartender. Pour me a cold one. “ “Hey, go on, kid, you wanna get me in trouble?” “Maybe later. Right now I just wanna have a beer. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Tall Well-Iced Drink

A very thirsty man goes into a bar. As he’s sitting down, he hears the man next to him tell the bartender, “I’ll have another waterloo. “ The bartender gives the fellow a tall, well-iced drink, then asks the newcomer what he would like to drink. Thinking the other man’s drink may be a specialty … Read more