Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Judge Reaches

Judge Reaches

April 5, 2026

Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faces the opposing lawyers. ‘Both of you have given me a bribe,’ he says. ‘You, James, gave me £15,000. And you, Ronald, gave me £10,000.’ The judge reaches into his pocket, pulls out a cheque, and hands it to Tom. ‘I’m returning £5,000, and we’ll now decide

Wings Fall Off

Wings Fall Off

April 5, 2026

Two guys die in a car accident and an angel descends from heaven. “I am to give you your wings so you can fly to heaven. But if you think one dirty thought or act out one dirty act your wings will fall off. “ So they fly to heaven without any trouble but when

Sirens Jump

Sirens Jump

April 5, 2026

Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, “I hear sirens. Jump!” The second one said, “But we’re on the 13th floor!” The first one screamed back, “This is no time to be superstitious. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Pretty Girls

Pretty Girls

April 5, 2026

A guy was meeting a friend in a bar, and as he walked in he noticed two pretty girls looking at him. He heard one girl say to the other, “Nine. “ Feeling pleased with himself, he swaggered over to his buddy at the bar and told him that the girl in the corner had

Millionaire Crafty Devil

Millionaire Crafty Devil

April 5, 2026

A 60-year-old millionaire has just married a 20-year-old model. “You crafty old devil, “says his friend. ‘How did you manage to get a lovely young wife like that?’ “Easy, “replies the millionaire. “I told her I was 92. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Afraid I’ll Need

Afraid I’ll Need

April 5, 2026

Late one Friday night a policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. They pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening. “Aye, so I have’tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light