Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Rival Professor
April 5, 2026
A professor was walking along a very narrow street when he came face to face with a rival professor. The street was too narrow for two to pass. The rival, pulling himself up to his full height, said haughtily: “I never make way for fools!” Smiling, the professor stepped aside and said: “I always do.
Brass Gong
April 5, 2026
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends late one night, the drunk led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong. “What’s that big brass gong for?” one of the guests asked. “Why, that’s the talking clock, “the man replied. “How does it work?” “Watch”, the man said, giving
Hour Later
April 5, 2026
Doctor: “What seems to be your problem?” Patient: “When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour. “ Doctor: “Try getting up one hour later. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Captain Announces
April 5, 2026
Two Antartians were flying from New York to Miami. Twenty minutes into the flight, the Captain announces, “One of the engines has failed and the flight will be an hour longer. But don’t worry, we have three engines left. “ Forty minutes later, the Captain announces, “One more engine has failed and the flight will
Passengers Stops
April 5, 2026
On a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual and to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they’ll be flying, the expected arrival time, and a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight. . Then, forgetting to turn off the
Couldn’t Pick
April 5, 2026
A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, “Give me the fingers and I’ll see what I can do. “ “But I don’t have the fingers!” “Why didn’t you bring the fingers?!” asks the incredulous doctor. “Doc, I couldn’t pick them
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light