Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Lip Prints

Lip Prints

April 5, 2026

A private school was faced with a strange problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lip stick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Every night the

Golden Spoon Identical

Golden Spoon Identical

April 5, 2026

Two thieves each sneak into a rich man’s party. During dinner the thieves marveled at how even the cutlery was made of gold, and both decided they would try to steal some. The first thief quietly slipped a golden spoon into his pocket, unaware that the second thief had witnessed this crime. After dinner, the

God’s Sake Stop

God’s Sake Stop

April 5, 2026

Dentist to the patient: “For God’s sake, stop making those noises and waving your arms. I haven’t even touched your tooth yet. “ Patient: “Yes, I know. But you’re standing on my foot. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Cooler Without Panties

Cooler Without Panties

April 5, 2026

Two girls take a walk on a hot summer day. They see an old lady sitting in front of her house eating watermelon. They notice she isn’t wearing any panties. “Is it cooler without panties?” they ask. She says, “I don’t know if it’s cooler, but it sure keeps the flies off the watermelon. “

Captain’s Nephew

Captain’s Nephew

April 5, 2026

On a Roman warship, the galley boss looked over his slaves and shouted, “Today I have good news. All of you are getting extra food tonight. “ The slaves all looked at him in silence, except one decrepit old man in the back, who moaned, “Oh God, no, not again. “ A new slave next

Health Inspector

Health Inspector

April 5, 2026

The City Health inspector walks into a new restaurant unannounced and takes a seat where he can see the kitchen. While he is sitting there, an order goes back for a pizza. The chef appears and the health inspector nearly chokes when he sees that he is not wearing a shirt. As if the health

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light