Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Silk Robe
April 5, 2026
A cab driver reaches the pearly gates. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book and tells him to pick up a gold staff and a silk robe and proceed into Heaven. Next in line is a preacher. St. Peter looks him up in his Big Book, furrows his brow and says, “OK, we’ll
Jack I’ve
April 5, 2026
Steve lies dying, as Jack, his law partner of 40 years, sits at his bedside. “Jack, I’ve got to confess — I’ve been sleeping with your wife for 30 years, I’m the father of your daughter, and I’ve been stealing from the firm for a decade. “ “Relax, “says Jack, “and don’t think about it.
Final Request
April 5, 2026
Cannibals capture three men. The men are told that they will be skinned and eaten and then their skin will be used to make canoes. Then the three men are each given a final request. The first man asks to be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible. His request is granted, and they poison
Pain Please Allow
April 5, 2026
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed-off and watched in horror as the ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. Indeed, the ball hit one of the men and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to
Efficiency Expert Concluded
April 5, 2026
An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. “You don’t want to try these techniques at home. “ “Why not?” asked somebody from the audience. “I watched my wife’s routine at breakfast for years, “the expert explained. “She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying a
Hollers Lady
April 5, 2026
A lady goes to the doctor to see about getting a facelift. “Well, “says the doctor, “I can do the facelift, and then you’ll have to come back in six months for a follow-up. “ “Oh, no. “the woman replies. “I want it all done in one shot. I don’t want to have to come
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light