Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Joe Poked Josey

Joe Poked Josey

April 5, 2026

Josey wasn’t the best pupil at Sunday school. She often fell asleep and one day while she was sleeping, the teacher asked her a question. “Who is the creator of the universe?” Joe was sitting next to Josey and decided to poke her with a pin to wake her up. Josey jumped and yelled, “God

Exact Words – Goes See

Exact Words – Goes See

April 5, 2026

A man goes to see a wizard and says “Can you lift a curse that was put on me 30 years ago ?” “Maybe, “says the wizard, “If you can remember the exact words of the curse ?” The man replies without hesitation “I pronounce you man and wife … “ This joke is included

Blow Job

Blow Job

April 5, 2026

An ugly bloke walks into a pub with a huge grin on his face. “What are you so happy about ?” asks the landlord. “Well, I live by the railway and on my way home last night I noticed a woman tied to the tracks. I cut her free and we shagged all night !”

Drunk Fella Home

Drunk Fella Home

April 5, 2026

Drinking all night at a bar a man stumbles to the restroom to throw up. He doesn’t make it in time and pukes all over the front of his shirt. As the drunk returned to the bar the bartender asked: “What the hell happened?” The drunk is very upset explaining to the bartender: “My wife’s

Harvard Sweatshirt Even

Harvard Sweatshirt Even

April 5, 2026

A girl goes into the doctor’s office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, the doctor notices a red ‘H’ on her chest. “How did you get that mark on your chest?” asks the doctor. “Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he’s so proud of it he never takes off his Harvard

Maiden Name

Maiden Name

April 5, 2026

Two men are having a drink together. One says, ‘I had sex with my wife before we were married. What about you?’ ‘I don’t know,’ says the other. ‘What was her maiden name?’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light