Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Ant Wakes

Ant Wakes

April 5, 2026

An ant and an elephant share a night of romance. The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead. “Shit!” says the ant. “One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order

Stud Rooster

Stud Rooster

April 5, 2026

A farmer went out one day and bought a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The new rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, “Ok old fart, time for you to retire. “ The old rooster replies, “Come on, surely you cannot handle all of these chickens. Look what it has

Cowboy Remains Silent

Cowboy Remains Silent

April 5, 2026

Three cowboys sit around a campfire bragging about their adventures. The first says, “I gotta be the meanest, toughest cowboy there is. Just the other day, a bull got loose in the corral and gored six men. I wrestled that sumbitch to the ground with my bare hands. “ The second cowboy laughs, “That’s nothing.

Sexy Redhead Johnny

Sexy Redhead Johnny

April 5, 2026

Johnny, George, and Bert were driving along in their pickup when they saw a sheep caught in the fence with its hind end up in the air. Bert said, “I wish that was a sexy brunette. “ George echoed, “I wish it was a sexy redhead. “ Johnny sighed, “I wish it was dark… “

Scissors Inside 2

Scissors Inside 2

April 5, 2026

After surgery, the doctor said to the patient, “I am sorry, but I forgot a pair of scissors inside you. I need to… “ The patient quickly responded, “Oh don’t bother, doctor! If it is because of that, just tell me how much it cost and I will pay you back. “ This joke is

Spoons Therefore

Spoons Therefore

April 5, 2026

At a restaurant, one of the customers notices that all of the waiters have two spoons in their vest pockets. A waiter explains, “We see that the most frequently dropped silverware is spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement. “ Then the customer notices a string hanging out of all the waiters’ flies. “The string

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light