Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Body’s Blood

Body’s Blood

April 5, 2026

Doctor: “Yes, what is it I can do for you?” Blond: “Doctor, yesterday, when I was doing my yoga, one of my friends told me that if I did this particular exercise, all my body’s blood would go into my head. But, when I stand, why doesn’t anyone say that all the blood would go

Friend Mike Jeff

Friend Mike Jeff

April 5, 2026

Jeff and Mike are in a car accident and both die. Upon Jeff’s arrival at the Pearly Gates, he is met by St. Peter. “Where is my friend Mike?” Jeff asked. St. Peter replies, “Well, Mike was not as fortunate as you. He went in the other direction instead of getting into Heaven. “ Jeff

Typewriter Period Missing

Typewriter Period Missing

April 5, 2026

A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor. “Doc, I’m afraid my typewriter is pregnant. “ The doctor asks, “Why in the world would you think that?” She says, “Because it’s started missing its period. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Farther California

Farther California

April 5, 2026

Two blondes are sitting on a bench at the park. One says to the other, “Hey, which is farther, California or the moon?” The other blonde says, “Well, duh! Can you see California?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday

April 5, 2026

This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card. She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards – something unusual. The clerk points her to a new card just in that day -”Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry. “ The blonde replied, “How cool! I’ll take

Else Yells

Else Yells

April 5, 2026

A blonde’s house is on fire. She runs outside and yells, “Help me! My house is on fire! What should I do?!” Someone else yells, “Call 911!” The blonde yells back, “What’s the number?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light