Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Rancher Throws Down

Rancher Throws Down

April 5, 2026

DEA officer stops at a ranch in Texas, and talks with an old rancher. . He tells the rancher, “I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs. “ The rancher says, “Okay , but do not go in that field over there, “as he points out the location. The DEA officer verbally explodes

Starter Pistol

Starter Pistol

April 5, 2026

A man was having premature ejaculation problems so he went to the doctor. The doctor said, “When you feel like you are getting ready to ejaculate, try startling yourself. “ That same day the man went to the store and bought himself a starter pistol and ran home to his wife. That night the two

Leopard Halts

Leopard Halts

April 5, 2026

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her poodle along for company. One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, discovers that he’s lost. Wandering about, he notices a hungry-looking leopard heading rapidly in his direction. The poodle thinks, “Oh, oh!” Noticing some bones on the

Rolled Down Backwards

Rolled Down Backwards

April 5, 2026

Two guys on a double bike were pedaling up a hill. It took forever to get to the top. When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, “Whew, that was so hard. “ The second replied, “Yeah, good thing I was pushing the brakes the whole time or we

Someday You’ll Thank

Someday You’ll Thank

April 5, 2026

The boss had listened in sympathetic silence as Theodor went through the reasons why he needed, and felt he deserved, a raise. Then, with a compassionate smile, the CEO patted the younger man on the shoulder. “Yes, Teo, “he said kindly, “I know you can’t get married on the salary I’m paying you… and someday

Evening’s Newspaper Carried

Evening’s Newspaper Carried

April 5, 2026

A fisherman accidentally left his day’s catch under the seat of a bus. The next evening’s newspaper carried an ad: “If the person who left a bucket of fish on the No. 47 bus would care to come to the garage, he can have the bus. “ This joke is included in the Black Book

Treding Jokes

The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.

Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light