Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Sex Education Lucy

Sex Education Lucy

April 5, 2026

Government planned to implement Sex Education in schools. School authority wanted to send a teacher called Lucy for a special training course in Sex Education. Lucy: “No Sir. . ! I don’t want to take part in that course. “ Principal:”No. . ! But why . . ?!” Lucy:”Somebody told me yesterday. . The Final

Witness Hesitated

Witness Hesitated

April 5, 2026

A woman was being questioned in a court trial involving slander. “Please repeat the slanderous statements you heard, exactly as you heard them, “instructed the lawyer. The witness hesitated. “But they are unfit for any respectable person to hear, “she protested. “Then, “said the attorney, “just whisper them to the judge. “ This joke is

Idiot John

Idiot John

April 5, 2026

John was asked by his son “Dad, how come I have brown skin and you are white?” “Well just look at your mum, son. “John said. “But she’s not black. “ “I know, you idiot!” John replied, “She’s a fucking whore!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it

Collect Donations

Collect Donations

April 5, 2026

Son: “Dad, there is someone at the door to collect donations for a community swimming pool. “ Father: “Okay, give him a glass of water. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Fifteen Dollars

Fifteen Dollars

April 5, 2026

Two Irishmen are traveling to Australia and before they leave home, one of their dads gives them both a bit of advice: “You watch them Aussie cab drivers. They’ll rob you blind. Don’t you go paying them what they ask. You haggle. “ At the Sydney airport, the Irishmen catch a cab to their hotel.

Genie Responds

Genie Responds

April 5, 2026

While walking along a beach, a man finds a lamp and rubs it off. A genie appears and offers to grant the man one wish. The man replies, “What about three?” The genie retorts “Look pal, I’m in a hurry, I’ve been cooped up in that damn lamp for… “ “OK, alright” the guy responds.

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Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light