Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Those Pink Flamingos
April 5, 2026
A customer at the counter of a garden ornament shop said to the cashier, “Give me four of those pinwheels, two of those pink flamingos, two of those sunflowers, and one of those bent-over grandmas in bloomers. “ The cashier replied, “That’ll be eight dollars for the pinwheels, ten for the flamingos, six for the
Deep Depression
April 5, 2026
A guy is walking down the street with his friend. He says to his friend, “I’m a walking economy. “ His friend replies, “How’s that?” “It’s like this, my hairline is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is putting me into a deep depression. “ This
Rabbi Thanked
April 5, 2026
A Rabbi and a Priest were sitting in front of a church and they each had charity boxes in front of them to collect money. The church goers that were passing by couldn’t believe the nerve of the rabbi, and purposely threw large sums of money into the priest’s charity box to spite the rabbi.
Pub Talk Okay
April 5, 2026
A drunk asked a barman, “Who did you vote for in the last election?” “None of your business, “the barman answered, “And besides, you never talk politics in a pub. “ “Okay, “said the drunk. “What church do you go to?” “None of your business, “the barman answered, “And besides, you never talk about religion
Railroad Train Schedules
April 5, 2026
And how is your customer service”? Asked a skeptical customer to the used car dealer. “Oh, that’s first class. Anybody who buys a car from us gets a free copy of the latest railroad train schedules!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Mad Cow Disease
April 5, 2026
There were two cows standing in the field, one cow says to the other: “boy that mad cow disease has got me worried” the other cow says I’m not worried, I’m a penguin” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light