Humor , distilled.
Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
Cried Again O-O-Oh
April 5, 2026
A man came home from the bar with an unknown woman. He woke up in the morning and yelled, “A crocodile, a crocodile!” The woman woke up and asked, “Where, where?” A man cried again, “O-o-oh, the crocodile is talking!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from
Grass Branches Dirt
April 5, 2026
A man walks into a friend and sees that his friend’s car is a total-loss and covered with leaves, grass, branches, dirt and blood. He asks his friend, “What’s happened to your car?” “Well, “the friend responses, “I ran into a lawyer. “ “OK, “says the man, “that explains the blood… But what about the
Pregnant God Well
April 5, 2026
Doctor: Well, it looks like you’re pregnant. Woman: Oh my God, I’m pregnant?! Doctor: No, it just looks like you are. This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
Lizard Climbs
April 5, 2026
A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint when a lizard walks past and looks up and says to the monkey, “Hey! what are you doing?” The monkey says, “Smoking a joint; come up and have some if you like. “ So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and
Scissors Inside
April 5, 2026
After surgery, the doctor said to the patient, “I am sorry, but I forgot a pair of scissors inside you. I need to… “ The patient quickly responded, “Oh don’t bother, doctor! If it is because of that, just tell me how much it cost and I will pay you back. “ This joke is
Cashier Reached
April 5, 2026
While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer, wine, and liquor section. One asked the other if she would like a beer. The second nun answered that, indeed, it would be very nice to have one, but that she would feel uncomfortable purchasing it. The first nun replied that
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light