Humor , distilled.
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Latest Jokes
Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh
The Veterinarian – Small Rural
April 5, 2026
In one small rural town the sheriff also fulfilled the role of the town’s veterinarian. One night the phone rang, and his wife answered. An agitated voice inquired, “Is your husband there?” “He is, but tell me, do you need him as the sheriff or the vet?” the wife asked. “Both!” was the reply. “We
You’ll Even Catch
April 5, 2026
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 5:25 train. “ The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 5:10 one. “ This joke
Single Malt Scotch
April 5, 2026
A man walks into a bar, and tells the bartender to pour him a 12 year old single malt scotch “before the trouble starts. “ The bartender pours his drink and quietly moves away. After finishing his drink, the man calls the bartender back and tells him “pour me a 15 year old scotch before
Bartender Apologized
April 5, 2026
An old guy walks into a bar and the bartender asks for ID. “You’ve got to be kidding, “he said. “I’m almost 60 years old!” The bartender apologized, but said he had to see the license. The guy showed his ID, then paid and told the bartender to keep the change. “The tip’s for carding
Fairy Godmother
April 5, 2026
A big bullfrog is in the middle of the swamp crying out his lament about being stuck so far from all the action. Out of nowhere this fairy godmother appears and tells him he will have an encounter with a beautiful young woman in three years. The bullfrog asks this fairy godmother why it will
Both Those Books
April 5, 2026
One day the zookeeper noticed that the Orangutan was reading two books – the Bible and Darwin’s Origin of Species. In surprise he asked the ape, “Why are you reading both those books”? “Well, “said the Orangutan, “I just wanted to know if I was my brother’s keeper or my keeper’s brother. “ This joke
Treding Jokes
The most popular jokes currently circulating the database. Guaranteed to provide an immediate return on your procrastination investment.
Chinese Proverb
April 5, 2026
James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light