Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Seat Bolts Lucy

Seat Bolts Lucy

April 5, 2026

Charlie’s wife, Lucy, had been after him for several weeks to paint the seat on their toilet. Finally, he got around to doing it while Lucy was out. After finishing, he left to take care of another matter before she returned. She came in and undressed to take a shower. Before getting in the shower,

Omg Nobody

Omg Nobody

April 5, 2026

Blonde: “What does IDK stand for?” Brunette: “I don’t know. “ Blonde: “OMG, nobody does!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Twins Pregnant Crying

Twins Pregnant Crying

April 5, 2026

A blonde goes to the doctor’s and finds out she is pregnant with twins. She starts crying and the doctor asks her what’s wrong. She replies, “I know who the dad is for one of them but I don’t know who the dad is for the other one!” This joke is included in the Black

Brunette Which Part

Brunette Which Part

April 5, 2026

Brunette: “Where were you born?” Blonde: “Australia. “ Brunette: “Which part?” Blonde: “My whole body. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Chickens Prepare Waitress

Chickens Prepare Waitress

April 5, 2026

“May I take your order?” the blonde waitress asked. “Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?” “Nothing special sir, “she replied, “we just tell them straight out that they’re going to die. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Firetruck Duh

Firetruck Duh

April 5, 2026

A blonde’s neighbor’s house was on fire so she called 911. The blonde told the operator, “My neighbor’s house is on fire!” The operator asked, “Where are you?” The blonde answered, “At my house. “ The operator replied, “No, I’m asking how do we get there?” The blonde said, “In a firetruck, duh! This joke

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Treding Jokes

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Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light