Humor , distilled.

Discover jokes , memes and funny quotes to brighten your day.

Latest Jokes

Welcome to Jokes.ltd, the Internet’s leading repository for carefully distilled humor. In a world cluttered with endless feeds and overwhelming noise, we recognized the need for a streamlined, highly efficient platform dedicated entirely to making you laugh

Others Raise

Others Raise

April 5, 2026

Three men are sitting naked in the sauna. Suddenly there is a beeping sound. The first man presses his forearm and the beeping stops. The others look at him questioningly. “That’s my pager, “he says. “I have a microchip under the skin of my arm. “ A few minutes later a phone rings. The second

Ardent Pitch

Ardent Pitch

April 5, 2026

At a country-club party a young man was introduced to an attractive girl. Immediately he began paying her court and flattering her outrageously. The girl liked the young man, but she was taken a bit aback by his fast and ardent pitch. She was amazed when after 30 minutes he seriously proposed marriage. “Look, “she

Jock Returned Sweaty

Jock Returned Sweaty

April 5, 2026

The basketball coach stormed into the university president’s office and demanded a raise right then and there. “Please, “protested the college president, “you already make more than the entire History department. “ “Yeah, maybe so, but you don’t know what I have to put up with, “the coach blustered. “Look. “ He went out into

Ball Type

Ball Type

April 5, 2026

A man went into the drugstore and asked for a deodorant. “The ball type?” asked the clerk. “No, “said the dumb man. “It’s for my underarms. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Voice Answers Schwartz

Voice Answers Schwartz

April 5, 2026

A man calls a lawyer’s office. A voice answers, ‘Schwartz, Schwartz and Schwartz.’ The man says, ‘Let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘I’m sorry, he’s on vacation.’ ‘Then let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘He’s in a big case, not available for a week.’ ‘Okay, then, let me talk to Mr Schwartz.’ ‘Speaking.’ This joke

Captain Responds Patricia

Captain Responds Patricia

April 5, 2026

The flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board, so she reports it to the Captain immediately. “Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty, hot and sexy, female passenger on board, who looks quite frightened and the man she is with is a fat old slob

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Treding Jokes

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Chinese Proverb

Chinese Proverb

April 5, 2026

James was sitting in a Chinese restaurant when it suddenly went dark. The waiter came over and said: “You all need to start clapping!” “What a weirdo, “James thought. Anyway everyone started to clap and the lights came on! James said: “How did that happen?” The waiter replied: “Old Chinese proverb, many hands make light