A woman, on meeting a psychologist at a party, made a pitch for some free professional advice. “What kind of toy would you suggest giving a little boy on his third birthday?” she asked. “First I’d have to know more about the child, “the psychologist hedged. The woman took a deep breath. “He’s very bright … Read more
Two starving cannibals, a father and son, were out trying to get something to eat. They walked deep into the jungle and waited by a path. Before long, along came a little old man. The son said, “Oh Dad, there’s one. “ “No, “said the father. “There’s not enough meat on that one to even … Read more
A grandmother sent her grandson a shirt for his birthday. The only trouble was that he had a size 14 neck and the shirt was size 12. When the grandson sent a thank you note, he wrote, “Dear Grandma. Thanks a lot for the shirt. I’d write more, but I’m all choked up. “ This … Read more
A traveling salesman rings this doorbell. 10 year old little Johnny opens, holding a beer and smoking a fat cigar. The salesman says, “Little boy is your mother home?” Little Johnny taps his ash on the carpet and says, “What do you think?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can … Read more
On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist’s son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, “I bet I know what it is – it’s some flowers!” “That’s right!” shouted the little boy. Then the candy store owner’s daughter handed the … Read more
Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents the week before Christmas. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers when the youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs. “I PRAY FOR A NEW BICYCLE… “ “I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO… “ “I PRAY … Read more
Eight-year-old Nina brought her report card home from school. Her marks were good…mostly A’s and a couple of B’s. However, her teacher had written across the bottom: “Nina is a smart little girl, but she has one fault. She talks too much in school. I have an idea I am going to try, which I … Read more
Little Johnny and a little girl are playing. Little Johnny pulls down his shorts and says, “I have one of these and you don’t. “ The little girl starts crying and crying and runs home to her mother. The next day Little Johnny and the girl are playing together again. Once again Little Johnny points … Read more
In the supermarket was a man pushing a cart which contained a screaming, bellowing baby. The gentleman kept repeating softly, “Don’t get excited, Albert; don’t scream, Albert; don’t yell, Albert; keep calm, Albert. “ A woman standing next to him said, “You certainly are to be commended for trying to soothe your son, Albert. “ … Read more
Little Johnny walks into his dad’s bedroom and sees him sliding on a condom. His father tries to hide it by bending over, as if to look under the bed. Little Johnny asks curiously, “What are you doing, Dad?” His father quickly replies, “I thought I saw a mouse go underneath the bed. “ Little … Read more