A small boy turned to his aunt Michelle and said, “Wow, you’re not pretty!” His mother overheard the remark and was appalled. She took him aside and gave him a real telling-off before ordering him to go back out to say sorry to Aunt Michelle. Suitably chastened, the boy went over and said quietly, “Aunt … Read more
Daughter: “Mommy, where did I come from?” Mom: “Sweetheart, you came out from Mommy’s body. “ Daughter: “How exactly?” Mom: “Well, your head came out first, then your arms, followed by your legs. “ Daughter: “How did you assemble them?” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more
Miss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time and she asked, “My name begins with the letter ‘M’ and I pick up things. What am I?” A little … Read more
After all the little children finished visiting Santa at the big mall, a 25 year old young lady went up and sat on Santa’s knee. “I want to ask for just one thing for Christmas, “she said, “and it is for my momma. “ Santa replied, “I usually only answer little children, but since it … Read more
A little boy said he wanted a baby brother. His Dad smiled and suggested he pray for one. The boy prayed earnestly, night after night, but after a couple weeks with no baby brother, he didn’t bother to ask anymore. A few months later Dad said Mom was in the hospital and had a surprise. … Read more
One year, a man decided to buy his mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn’t buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, “Well, you still haven’t used the gift I bought you last year!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
A father came home from a long business trip to find his son riding a very fancy new 10 speed bike. ”Where did you get the money for the bike? It must have cost $300. ” ”Easy, Dad,” the boy replied. ”I earned it hiking. ” ”Come on,” the father said, ”tell me the truth?” … Read more
Two explorers, camped in the heart of the African jungle, were discussing their expedition. “I came here, “said one, “because the urge to travel was in my blood. City life bored me, and the smell of exhaust fumes on the highways made me sick. I wanted to see the sunrise over new horizons and hear … Read more
Kwamei walks into a restaurant and wants to order chicken. Unfortunately, English is not his first language and he can’t remember how to say chicken in English. Kwame sees the guy at the table next to him with a plate with 4 boiled eggs on it. Kwame points to the plate of eggs and says … Read more
An expectant mother was being rushed to the hospital, but didn’t quite make it. She gave birth to her baby on the hospital lawn. Later, the father received a bill, listing “Delivery Room Fee: $400. “ He wrote to the hospital and reminded them the baby was born on the front lawn. After a week … Read more