Little Johnny and his two friends are sitting on the front porch one day. The first one says, “My Daddy is so cool he can eat four Burgers at one meal. “ The second one says, “That’s nothing. My Daddy can eat six. “ Little Johnny starts laughing and says, “My Daddy can eat light … Read more
After a long time two friends met, happy to see each other. One of them, chewing on something big, asked his friend how he was and what was new in his life. After the friend told his story, he asked the same question to the friend who was chewing something. “So, what’s up man?” “It’s … Read more
“Three guys are alone on a desert island: an engineer, a biologist and an economist. They are starving and don’t have anything to eat, but somehow they find a can of beans on the shore. The engineer says: “Let’s hit the can with a rock until it opens. “ The biologist has another idea: “No. … Read more
A guy buys his first motorcycle. The dealer tells him to keep a jar of Vaseline handy to rub on the chrome before it rains to prevent rusting. A few months later, the young man’s girlfriend invites him to dinner at her parents’ house. Before they go in, she explains their family tradition that whoever … Read more
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, “What is that?” “They’re smart pills, “said the other boy. “Eat them and they’ll make you smarter. “ So he ate them and said, “These taste like crap. “ “See, “said the other boy, “you’re … Read more
A waitress walks up to a man to take his order. “I’d like to get the turtle soup, please. “ The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead. “Hold the turtle, make it pea!” This joke is included in the … Read more
Two alligators are sitting on the edge of a swamp. The small one turns to the big one and says; “I don’t understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We’re the same age, we were the same size as kids… I just don’t get it. “ “Well, “says the big alligator, “what … Read more
Three rabbits escape from a testing lab and find an entire field full of carrots. They eat themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The next morning, they find an entire field full of female rabbits with no males in sight. They screw themselves into a stupor and sleep throughout the night. The … Read more
At a restaurant, one of the customers notices that all of the waiters have two spoons in their vest pockets. A waiter explains, “We see that the most frequently dropped silverware is spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement. “ Then the customer notices a string hanging out of all the waiters’ flies. “The string … Read more
A young man finally got a date with the blonde female that lived in his apartment complex. To prepare for his big date, the young man went up onto the roof of his apartment building in order to tan himself. Not wanting any tan lines to show, he sunbathed in the nude. Unfortunately, the young … Read more