Rushing up to a large airline’s ticket counter, a man gasped, “Miss, please help me. I have to get to Chicago in the worst way!” The clerk calmly pointed to her left and said, “Sir, that would be the airline next to us. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
“Nothing looks good on me anymore, “wailed a customer modeling an outfit in front of the department store’s mirror. “Nonsense, ma’am, “soothed the salesclerk. “That dress says it all. “ “That’s the problem, “the woman replied. “I need a dress that keeps its mouth shut. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of … Read more
Two deer hunters met in the woods. The first one said to the other, “Boy am I glad to see you, I’ve been lost for hours. “ The second deer hunter said, “Don’t get too excited, friend, I’ve been lost for three weeks. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more
A very inebriated lady walked into a bar shortly before closing time, sat at the bar and ordered, “Barbender, barbender, I would like a Martoutsy. “ The bartender brought her a Martini, which she drinks in one gulp. “Barbender, I would like another Martoutsy”, again the bartender brought her a Martini. By this time the … Read more
One night as a bartender is closing up his bar, he hears a knock at the back door. When he opens the door, there stands a bum who asks, “Can I have a toothpick?” The bartender gives him a toothpick and continues cleaning up his bar. Five minutes later, he hears another knock at the … Read more
It’s night and a drunk is crawling along the pavement looking for something. A passer-by offers to help and asks what’s missing. The drunk replies that he’s lost his watch. ‘And where did you lose it?’ asks the passer-by. ‘About half a mile up the road,’ replies the drunk. ‘So why are you down here?’ … Read more
A man orders a pint of beer, notices it tastes sour and complains to the barman. ‘What are you moaning about?’ says the barman. ‘You’ve only got a pint of that rubbish, I’ve got three barrels full.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
After 8 rounds the boxer comes back in his corner, extremely grinded. The couch says to him: “You should make a decision! You want the champion title or the Nobel for peace… “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
A drunk falls into one of the fountains in Trafalgar Square. Floundering around, he looks up and sees Nelson standing on his column. ‘Don’t jump!’ he shouts. ‘This is the shallow end!’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.
The Golfer asked his Caddy, “Hey boy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday? Caddy replied, “The way you play, Sir, its a crime any day of the week!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.