General Jokes

Haven’t Eaten

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A beggar walks up to a well-dressed woman out shopping. ‘I haven’t eaten anything in four days,’ he says. She looks at him and says, ‘God, I wish I had your willpower.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Which Adam

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Adam goes to God and says, “I would like a mate to please me and make living joyful. She should be beautiful and perfect in every way. “ God says, “Certainly I can do that, but it will cost you a testicle, a kidney, and one eye. “ To which Adam replied, “Well, what can … Read more

Martial Arts

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A guy is sitting in a bar and turns to the Asian guy next to him and asks: “Hey do you know, Tae Kwon Do, Jiu Jitsu, Kung Fu or any of that sh*t?” Offended, the Asian man replies: “What do you think that just because I’m Asian I know martial arts?” The man replies: … Read more

Serve Lawyers

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A man walks into a bar with an alligator. He says to the bartender, ‘Do you serve lawyers here?’ ‘Sure do,’ replies the bartender. ‘Good,’ says the man. ‘Give me a beer, and a lawyer for my’gator.’ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from here.

Tanks Mister Sex

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An Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man asks him, “What’s wrong?” The boy says, “Me ma is dead”. “Oh bejaysus, “the man says. “Do you want me to call Father O’Riley for you?” The boy replies, “No tanks mister. Sex is the last ting on my mind at the … Read more

Hard Sniff

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One day there was a blind man walking down the street and he smelled oranges, so he bought some fruit. He smelled some pastries, so he bought some donuts. Then he walked past a fish market, took a hard sniff, and said, “Hello ladies!” This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You … Read more

Senior Partner

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A young lawyer, defending a businessman in a lawsuit, feared he was losing the case and asked his senior partner if he should send a box of cigars to the judge to curry favor. The senior partner was horrified. “The judge is an honorable man, “he said, “If you do that, I guarantee you’ll lose … Read more