A man enters a barber shop for a shave. While the barber is foaming him up, he mentions the problems he has getting a close shave around the cheeks. “I have just the thing, “says the barber, taking a small wooden ball from a nearby drawer. “Just place this between your cheek and gum. “ … Read more
There is a knock on the pearly gates. Saint Peter looks out, and a man is standing there. Saint Peter is about to begin his interview when the man disappears. A moment later there’s another knock. Saint Peter gets the door, sees the man, opens his mouth to speak, but the man disappears once again. … Read more
A man and a woman went to court disputing over custody of their child. The Judge asked the woman to rise and argue her case. “I went through all the pain of undergoing labor and I see no reason why the child’s custody should not be handed to me”, she pleaded. The man replied, “Your … Read more
A crazy man jumps from the bushes and opens his coat in front of an old lady to surprise and terrify her. The granny takes a look at him and says: “Oh, Gosh, I’ve forgotten to buy the eggs. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order it from … Read more
A first-time flier was very nervous as he buckled his seat belt before takeoff. He turned to the woman in the next seat and asked, “How often do jetliners crash?” The woman thought for a moment and replied, “Usually, just once. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more
A helicopter carrying passengers suddenly loses engine power and the aircraft begins to descend. The pilot safely performs an emergency landing in water, and tells the passengers to remain seated and to keep the doors closed, stating that in emergency situations, the aircraft is designed to stay afloat for 30 minutes, giving rescuers time to … Read more
An old woman walks into a sex shop, shaking. “Sir, “she asks in a shaky voice, “do you sell vibrators?” “Yes, ma’am. “ “And are they this big around and this long?” she asks in a shaky voice. “Yes, ma’am. “ “And they’re $42. 95?” she asks in a shaky voice. “Yes, ma’am. “ “How … Read more
A lawyer sent an overdue bill to a client. A note was attached that stated: “This bill is one year old. “ By return mail the lawyer had his bill back. To it was attached a card which read: “Happy Birthday. “ This joke is included in the Black Book of Jokes. You can order … Read more
Two Scientists were working late discussing ideas about behavior modification studies. “We’ve started something new at my lab, “said the first scientist. “For some of our more dangerous experiments, we’re now using lawyers”. “Lawyers?” asks the second scientist. “Why aren’t you using rats?” “Well you know how it is, “the first scientist replies. “You can … Read more
A man walks into a bar and says “I just got back from the battered women’s shelter, and boy are my arms tired. “ Everyone laughed. The man sat at the end of the bar drinking alone. He was proud of the fine craftsmanship of the shelves he put up in the shelter’s pantry, regardless … Read more